I first rang Double Impact 5 weeks ago, this followed being discharged from hospital the previous week where I was treated for alcohol withdrawal. I have been battling alcohol misuse for over 2 years, I have always had a difficult relationship with alcohol from being a teenager. Covid and lockdown restrictions heightened my problems and I had a tendency to binge drink which then spiralled out of control. I had periods of abstinence, however these were closely followed by episodes of binge drinking.
From the initial phone call I was made to feel welcome, at the time of the first phone call I was at a real low point with both my emotional and mental well-being. I remember one of the questions being; ‘What do you enjoy doing?’ At this time I couldn’t genuinely think of anything that I enjoyed doing or anything that I did for myself. I was in a haze of emotions and had a really negative view on life and the future.
My son was staying with my sister and I felt lonely and worthless but most of all I felt afraid. I put off joining the Wednesday meeting and made excuses, I regretted this straight away and despite having builders in on the Friday I made the effort to join the meeting. Although this was the last meeting of the week I was made to feel welcome, I was extremely nervous and really only spoke if I was directly addressed. I left the first meeting feeling overwhelmed by the kindness and honesty of the members of the group and the hosts.
The fact that the groups are so welcoming, the positivity of moving forward and planning for the weekend really motivated me and I was already looking forward to the next meeting.
I continued to attend the zoom meetings for the following 3 weeks, I looked forward to the meetings and really felt like I had been made part of the group. The encouragement that the hosts and group gave each other, including myself continued to make me feel more and more positive about myself. I regained my confidence was able to talk with ease during the zoom meetings.
As the weeks went on I felt more and more empowered to make positive differences in my life. I applied for a new job and the team and hosts offered so much encouragement and the fact that they were eager to ask about my trial made me feel even more that I belonged and that my recovery meant something not only to me but also the group and hosts.
I got the job, I started work and due to the times I work I wasn’t ablet to join the group meetings, however it is now half term and I was able to join, I was welcomed back with open arms and the encouragement and support continued. It was lovely to see familiar faces and to see how other members are doing on their journey of recovery.
I am so grateful for Double Impact and the positive impact that these groups have had supporting me on my journey.
I genuinely don’t believe I would be where I was today if it wasn’t for this group! I am in such a better place now, I feel happy, I feel motivated, I feel confident and most importantly I feel like me!
I know the road ahead won’t always be smooth, and I am pretty sure that there will be rocks in the road, sharp bends and even diversions, but I know with the continued support of Double Impact there will be no road closure and throughout my journey I was always have guidance and support.